i wish i could be as strong as tamaki, but i'm not.
i can't treat everything with such optimism.
and after i knew that he's back, it's like my world just crashed.
i once told myself that i can't be still holding on to this anymore.
but... seems like my heart isn't listening to me.
and neither is my thoughts.
for the whole day, i've been listless.
i played cards in an attempt to divert my attention.
but i ended up losing due to my listlessness.
i had a pair of Jacks and a ten, mom and joey were having their last card and it was my call.
i could have placed a Jack and won the game.
but i didn't.
i played one Jack and lost the game.
then, i played a straight: 8,9,10,J,K.
fouled.
for the whole day, i clutched on to my phone, awaiting for something that i knew would never come.
